... issues and tissues with a touch of the spicy from the spirit hag ...

 

If they can send ONE man to the moon, why can't they send THEM ALL ?

It's official. They deserve to go. Every last one of 'em. Someone needs to build the space shuttle equivalent of the wooden horse of Troy and pack the scoundrels in there with a one way ticket to a lunar landing.

To provide justification of this measure, one needs look no further than the authors of the current spate of (I use the term loosely) books that claim to provide 'insight' into the 'inner workings of women'.

One such text provides a detailed chart claiming to 'decode' what women actually mean when they use certain phrases or gestures (such as the proverbial "What is wrong, dear ?" ... "NOTHING !!!").

An example of this decoding describes a situation where a woman accuses her husband of 'not doing enough around the house', and, according to the great wisdom of this 'author', this translates to mean that the wife is feeling 'insecure and unloved' and 'wants her husband to demonstrate his commitment to her as a man and provider'.

Now, as a woman in possession of: (a) most of her faculties, ( a half-renovated house, and (c) a husband who is a CARPENTER for criminys' sake, I can tell you pretty much straight out that when I say to my husband "You need to get some stuff done around the house" what I actually REALLY SECRETLY mean is "I want you to get some stuff done around the house".

As interesting as it may seem to attribute all sorts of hidden meanings and deep psychological resentments or fears to such common utterances, the only need driving MY request for the attentions of my husband to our house is that we have lived here for almost 2 years AND I STILL HAVE NO DOOR ON MY BATHROOM.

It's that simple.

I grow weary of watching our houseguests attempt to construct all manner of complicated 'screens' with our portable clothesline and towel rack in order to avoid being seen naked and wet by any random passer-by.

I do not have any deep-seated need to have my husband 'prove himself' to me by 'brightening up our nest'.

I'm just tired of my husband and I being banished upstairs whenever anyone who visits wants to bathe. (This, in some egotistical way, infers that we might WANT - even HOPE - to see our houseguests naked, which, quite frankly, we probably wouldn't).

So, even though men are NOT from Mars, and women are NOT from Venus, perhaps an ‘inter-planetary sexes-split’ could prove somewhat more beneficial than I initially thought .

 


Comments
on Mar 09, 2005
Because if they sent them all it would cause a large enough change in mass to disrupt the moons orbit and send both it and the earth into the sun. Mind you, it would take something like 5 billion years to make the trip. If you wanted a quick fix for the bathroom door you could take a sheet and two thumbtacks (or nails, staples, whatever) and tack it over the door shaped opening. Hmm, I must be a man, trying to fix the womans problems. Woohoo, go sexist comments
on Mar 09, 2005
my brother once found himself working atta place where they made wooden latticework (for gardens or somethin). he was not only the only guy working there but all his chick co-workers were lesbians. he told me one day he was reworking something that invariably caused problems and said 'jeez they can put a man on the moon..." at which point one of the women finished the thought for him, saying 'but they cant keep him there dammit.'
on Mar 09, 2005
Mmh, i dont think they actually got to the moon, but that's another debate i suppose.

And yeah, it seems that there is always a hidden meaning in what we say. Like d'oh! When i say i'm tired, well i'm really tired i'm not trying to avoid my man's company! geez!
on Mar 10, 2005
Great Article!!

Sociological generalities are great for anthropologists, statisticians and politicians. However, attempts to use those generalities to explain what individuals want (to me) is the basis for some of the best unintended comedy ever printed!! ;~D

My answer to the age old question, "what do women (or men) want": I don't know, why don't you ask her (him). ;~D

'jeez they can put a man on the moon..." at which point one of the women finished the thought for him, saying 'but they cant keep him there dammit.'


Hilarious!!!
on Mar 14, 2005

However, attempts to use those generalities to explain what individuals want (to me) is the basis for some of the best unintended comedy ever printed!!

parated, you're right !. (i'm starting to say that a lot, aren't i ? !)

Like d'oh! When i say i'm tired, well i'm really tired i'm not trying to avoid my man's company! geez!

island  gurl, you have it in one ! yay !. i have a bad habit of saying what i mean, too !

Hmm, I must be a man, trying to fix the womans problems. Woohoo, go sexist comments

now, luckily for you danny, i know you to be a man who would never do such a thing !

and btw, kingbee ... you make me smile everytime ... how do you do it ?. your comments are stand alone works of art in themselves  

mig XXX

 

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