... issues and tissues with a touch of the spicy from the spirit hag ...
Published on December 8, 2005 By mignuna In Misc

(This was sent to me by a friend and I can't find the original source, but I thought it was worth passing on. Mig)

 

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm, life isn't always fair, and maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).

His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place.

Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job they themselves failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.

It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer Panadol, sun lotion or a sticky plaster to a student - but could not inform the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband, churches became businesses, and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar can sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live after a woman failed to realise that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.

He is survived by three stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else is to Blame, and I'm A Victim.

Not many attended his funeral because so few realised he was gone.

If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.

 


Comments
on Dec 08, 2005
Ha, ha..I remember this one! I posted it some time ago and it's still very funny!
on Dec 08, 2005
Bravo
on Dec 08, 2005
Bravo
thankyou zoomba. i wish i wrote this !
Ha, ha..I remember this one! I posted it some time ago and it's still very funny!
foreverserenity, i didn't see your previous post as i haven't been around for a while, but i can see by your response that you don't mind that i posted it also. i'm glad you liked this as much as i did. mig xxx
on Dec 08, 2005
brilliant, thanks for posting this.
on Dec 08, 2005
brilliant, thanks for posting this.
you're welcome, Demosthenes Locke, glad you liked it.
The coffee was *so* superheated it melted her panythose to her crotch, and she literally lost chunks of pussy-meat to third degree burns
ewwwww ! oh gross, sabrina, i instinctively crossed my legs when i read that !
She was mutilated for life, and man...can you imagine the pain?
yes. yesssssssssssss ! (legs still crossed)
Sure, coffee's hot, but we dont expect it to be mutilatingly so, and most people don't know the full details of the case.
the thing only says that she 'spilled' some coffee, not that the cup actually fell to bits and scalded her, which is horrific. i was imagining someone absent mindedly spilling a small amount 'cause they were distracted driving or something, but that's so revolting, they deserved to be sued. mig xxx
on Dec 08, 2005
Excellent! Where do I send the flowers?
on Dec 08, 2005
Common Sense finally gave up the will to live after a woman failed to realise that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.


BTW: Here is the actual poop, the whole poop and nothing but the poop on the McDonalds award.

Link

yea it hurt, but then SOP hot coffee always does.
on Dec 08, 2005
Thanks for the link Doc.
And very nice to see you back as a regular Miggy.
on Dec 09, 2005

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job they themselves failed to do in disciplining their unruly children  As an old retired teacher, I empathize with this.

btw, long time between visits; it took you to break the ice....Well, not really, I went to your divorce blog the other day. [I've been busy with my book.] 

on Dec 09, 2005
hot coffee always does.
Coffee? At McDonald's, no way, they serve hot water.
on Dec 09, 2005

Coffee? At McDonald's, no way, they serve hot water.

yes, mcdonalds using the word 'coffee' is a fine example of creative licence, don't you agree stevededalus ?. next they'll be trying to tell us that they sell food !

it took you to break the ice

stevendedalus, i may not be the most regular of bloggers/visitors these days, but i never forget you !

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job they themselves failed to do in disciplining their unruly children As an old retired teacher, I empathize with this.

i'm sure you're glad you're still not teaching considering the new 'regulations' ?

And very nice to see you back as a regular Miggy.

thanks ssg geezer, it's nice to see you, and nice to be back

Here is the actual poop, the whole poop and nothing but the poop on the McDonalds award

thanks doc, i followed it too. it seems insane that they used those temperatures. i've been trying to find out if it's the same in australia.

Excellent! Where do I send the flowers?

to sabrina. for making me laugh like a wheezing tractor engine over the 'steaming chunks of pussy meat' comment.

mig XXX

on Dec 09, 2005

answering my own post ... how sad ... anyway, i just remembered a comment i wanted to add:

"I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forego their use!" --Galileo Galilei

 

on Dec 10, 2005

"I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forego their use!" --Galileo Galilei
Now that's common sense but profound!

And yes, I am glad I'm not teaching these days--I saw the handwriting on the wall a longtime ago and it was all senseless graffiti!

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