... issues and tissues with a touch of the spicy from the spirit hag ...

 

 

i am 36. one would think that, by now, i would have friends that, for the most part, weren’t stupid.

 

yet this is in fact not so.

 

now, i am not saying that my friends lack intelligence. far from it, in most cases.

 

i merely mean that, despite some of them being over 40, they still have the same issues that they had decades ago. issues that should be sorted in your 20’s (if you’re lucky) or your 30’s.

 

issues like ‘i don’t know what i want to do for a living’ and ‘my mother shits me’ and ‘i got someone pregnant by accident’ and ‘i wanna be star one day'.

 

now far be it for me to claim to be issue-free. (me, who has so many issues i should be a library and not a woman). but i at least understand that living means doing things you don’t like most of the time.

 

of course i’d rather loll about at home at home indulging my ‘creative whims’ and ‘being at one with myself’ or some shit, but the fact is i’d starve to death. and dying for your cause is not only counter-productive, it’s so very ‘out’ at the moment, darlings.

 

i should hasten to add that i like creative people. not that i consider myself to BE one, mind you, just that they’re on the whole less likely to be judgemental and more likely to be fun.

 

but that also means that my friends still think that they’re rock stars. or poets. or actors. or artists. (which, sadly, most of them actually are. but creativity and commercialism scarcely mix).

 

we have a musician living in a tent in our lounge room. (no, i am not kidding). not only is he talented, he is handsome, clever, funny and blindingly intelligent.

 

now, i can accept that he goes to bed at sunrise every single night. i can accept that he rejects the monetary culture. i can accept that he is the bluntest person on earth and says ‘you’d all eat shit, wouldn’t you ?’ to his audiences.

 

what i can’t accept is that he should care enough about himself to end this cycle of moving from place to place and band to band and partner to partner and crisis to crisis and just find some way to make a little life for himself.

 

you don’t need riches to be content, i agree. but you do need, at the very least, your dignity and your independence. dependence is never freedom, no matter how safe the supply.

 

 


Comments
on Feb 12, 2006
I'm soooo glad to see you posting again, mig! You are one of a kind!

Age is weird. I'm 27...closer to 30 than to 20...but I feel like I should be 23. I don't want to be too old for colored hair and quirky clothes. Although...since I had my children so young I skipped over a lot of drama. Perhaps I missed character-building experiences. I don't know.

All I know is...I can't live in a tent in someone's lounge room. I can't have partner dramas or unplanned pregnancies. I can't be a rock star or a poet. I'm a mommy and when I have to be, a working stiff. I accept that...maybe just because I love being a mommy and a wife so much. It works for me. I'm lucky because in a sense it all just fell in my lap.

I have a great life...by no virtue of my own. It's unearned...undeserved...but I have it. I know what I'm meant for (my precious babies most of all), and I don't have a lot of internal conflict.

Although...what do I know? I'm only 27. Hehe.

I'll bet you have rockin' friends, though, migs.
on Feb 12, 2006
"i am 36. one would think that, by now, i would have friends that, for the most part, weren’t stupid"

Stupidity knows no age limit! People sometimes don't get smart until they're in the fifties...I should know, I'm one of them.

I always knew about living responsibly, paying rent, lights, ect. Having my OWN place...

I believe we all are on the same trip, we just get there at different times, and sometimes we have to get OFF the road
our buddies are on, cause they're in the "slow lane", and we're not.

You can still love and enjoy your friends, just change the road to one more, shall we say traveled by others we are in tune with?
on Feb 12, 2006
Very nice. Do you ever wonder though if anyone ever really does settle these issues? And those few that do, don't they really just trade in the younger issues for an older set?
on Feb 14, 2006

And those few that do, don't they really just trade in the younger issues for an older set?

indeed we do, xtine. and i am no exception by a long shot.

I believe we all are on the same trip, we just get there at different times, and sometimes we have to get OFF the road our buddies are on, cause they're in the "slow lane", and we're not

wise words, trudy. thankyou. i may have to show 'them' that phrase !

I'll bet you have rockin' friends, though, migs

thanks, tex. i guess i do. well, a few of them anyway. i wonder what we have in common, though, sometimes. i feel more like a den mother than a friend !

mig xxx

on Feb 14, 2006
Hey, welcome back, migs...long time, no see.

Some people hang on to stupid things...it's just who they are until they get a clue that the things they whine about aren't exactly that important.

I'm only 17, and some of my friends drive me batty with talk like that....but perhaps I'm just too mature for my own good.

~Zoo
on Feb 15, 2006
I probably fit the description of your friend in some respects, although I don't live in a tent, have a very stable relationship, a long-term job and all the trappings that go with it. But, at 42, I'm (still) pursuing my dream of being a recognised songwriter.

I wonder... if one can't look after oneself, how is one expected to look after a burgeoning creative career 'when' it takes off. It takes a lot of hard work, organisation, dedication, committment and sacrafice.
on Feb 16, 2006

But, at 42, I'm (still) pursuing my dream of being a recognised songwriter

i'm 36 years old and have just gotten my first (very part time) writing job. it's okay to have dreams, but you can't make them your life. you and i know that, maso.

although I don't live in a tent, have a very stable relationship, a long-term job and all the trappings that go with it.

maso, you're not even close to being hopeless!. you have a 'real life' !

I'm only 17, and some of my friends drive me batty with talk like that....but perhaps I'm just too mature for my own good

zoo, you can never be too mature !. and thanks for the welcome back, i needed it

mig xxx

on Feb 18, 2006
Last line is fantastic.
on Mar 28, 2006

what i can’t accept is that he should care enough about himself to end this cycle of moving from place to place and band to band and partner to partner and crisis to crisis and just find some way to make a little life for himself. Sounds like my son who, at forty, still has a teenage crush on his guitar, along with his own "independent" music.