... issues and tissues with a touch of the spicy from the spirit hag ...
Published on February 16, 2006 By mignuna In Misc

my friend marco is smart. (so smart as to occasionally unintelligible, but i do my best).


it occurred to me recently whilst sharing a meal with him that his super computer mind would be an invaluable tool for those wishing to lose weight by being put off their food.


in the way of all highly intelligent persons, marco is unable to ‘dumb it down’ for us mere mortals and will tell me (as i am trying to ingest an unhealthily large portion of fried eggs) that i am consuming the menstrual product of a chicken.


exactly. i’d like to see YOU keep eating it after that. and it doesn’t stop there.


i should make a cd of him speaking whilst i try to eat. it’s revolting. and he doesn’t even know he’s doing it.


once i had a HUGE mouthful of hot dog and he looked at me and said ‘eyeballs’. before i had a chance to question him, he added ‘they make those out of the eyeballs, you know. and the feet, too ... the organs, like the brain and whatnot, also the other innards and scrap flesh’.


i threw it in the bin and had a hard time not vomiting on top of it.


(now, i’m socially awkward too. stupid things just seem to fly out of my mouth ... ‘you look pregnant, are you ?’, but i seem to be far less effective at making my dinner companions ill. i’m more of your social embarrassment type of friend. each to his own).


so, if you’d really like to be put off junk food for life, just let me know. i have someone you need to talk to .


on Feb 16, 2006
And what does marco eat? Is he by any chance munching on similar foodstuff while educating you? That is the best way to do it. Then even if you stop eating there they are, still munching away.
on Feb 16, 2006
Sign me up for a CD please!

Is he by any chance munching on similar foodstuff while educating you?

Good question...Does he?
on Feb 16, 2006
To paraphrase Homer Simpson "Ah, hotdogs, is there anything they can't do?" My father used to say hotdogs were the 'lips, tits and arseholes' of animals. Still, it never put me off eating them. But then, I've always been a fan of what my wife calls 'mystery meat'. Its funny, she loves devons, hotdogs and other such meat in packets but can't stand fish extender, which is really only hotdog of the sea.

I know a few people who would love a copy of the CD too.