... issues and tissues with a touch of the spicy from the spirit hag ...
Published on March 14, 2005 By mignuna In Misc


I recently overheard my husband honking and sniggering and asked him what he was laughing at. Incapable of speech, he merely gestured to the television screen - upon which was a woman dressed in a cow suit singing and dancing about the stage, clutching at her rubber ‘udder’ as she did so.

At first suspecting some awful ‘arty’ remake of ‘The Rocky Horror Picture Show’, I was astonished to find that I was in fact viewing an actual contestant on one of the ‘Idol’ shows. Now, you may or may not actually watch them, but you’d have needed to be the sole occupant of a very remote cave for the past year to have not noticed the ‘Idol’ phenomenon.


It’s sweeping the world with its promise of fame and fortune to the winner of each grueling series, and despite the fact that there now seems to be a multitude of such shows, hopefuls still show up in their thousands for their big ‘chance’.


I’m beginning to suspect that the only reason people get hooked on these shows is the curious combination of pity and hilarity that accompanies the additional auditions. Once you’ve seen a guy wearing his underpants on the outside of his clothing signing ‘Rubber Ducky’ (complete with quacking), you’re bound to be left wanting more !.


Which is a good thing, because the trend doesn’t look like it’s going to slow down anytime soon. Friends and relatives who have enough tact to tell their ‘aspiring musical artist’ that they should give up and take up tennis seem to be in short supply.


An entire entertainment industry boom is based on the total lack of a loved ones’ ability to just say “Dear, I think you should reconsider the cow suit”. Instead, convinced that the bovine attire is the winning edge needed, out they go full of confidence, only to find themselves later featured in a programme called something like “Well, At Least They Tried”.


In the event of a loved one of mine becoming convinced that they were destined to world fame via donning a disturbingly anatomically-correct animal suit, I’d like to think that I’d at least try to reason with them about their choice of tactics.


Because, after all, if your friends won’t tell you, several million television viewers certainly will.



on Mar 14, 2005
In high school I had a bus driver that would dress up like a cow each year for halloween (and I think another occasion too), complete with udder. I think she knew how strange she looked, but that didn't seem to bother her. Might be the same with this lady, she might well know she has no chance to win but is enjoying her time in the spotlight all the same. People do strange things on tv, and to get there. And rememember, moo cow makes milk (course, so do all mammals)
on Mar 15, 2005
Heh, i get what you're saying mignuna, it's like no one has the heart to tell them in their face that they're just gonna end up making a fool of themselves. But if It's kjust for the fun like Danny pointed out, then whatever! Let them be nuts!! Heheh!
on Mar 15, 2005
The poor unfortunates you speak of were born without their shame or embarassment bones, which leads them to make questionable fashion decisions, listen to and enjoying the sort of music that would make most of us run screaming off a cliff and be totally unembarrassable. Their families are so full of pity for the individual, they can only support any 'endeavour' they choose to involve themselves in.

Shows such as Idol etc., only serve to show the rest of the world how many of these unfortunates are out there. I believe instead of spending money on the shows, the organisers should be concentrating on establishing rehab centres for these people so they can learn to live relatively normal lives.
on Mar 15, 2005
Friends and relatives who have enough tact to tell their ‘aspiring musical artist’ that they should give up and take up tennis seem to be in short supply.

Who would do that when they get the entertainment of watching them?
on Mar 18, 2005

I think she knew how strange she looked, but that didn't seem to bother her

you have a point, danny. but gee there must be a lot of people that don't mind looking strange !

island_gurl, i suppose at least they make me feel better about my own (lack of) a singing voice !

maso, i can hardly type from laughing !. i must be in posession of 'shame and embarrassment bones' myself. perhaps such bones are being phased out ? it seems they're not needed in the world anymore !

nj, ok, ok, so it's kinda funny watching them, but still, if that was a loved one of mine, i'd have to tell them ! (even if only to spare myself the shame of anyone recognising them !. hmmm ... maybe i should reconsider the uses of cow-suits )

mig XXX