i hit someone once. a lady. well, ok, i sort of slapped her a bit. just a bit. my hand sort of slid off her face and it wasn't hard. but it still made a really good noise. i was in a shopping centre in a very affluent area some distance from my own home at the time. i usually would avoid such a place, but i was collecting my wedding gown. i was wandering down one of those big, wide aisles those places have. to be fair, i was meandering down the middle. but slowly. i should add that i can be s...

this is not a litany of praise for my righteousness but a damning tirade of curses for my stupidity, for which i ... ... DO NOT open like a flower in grateful thanks. i instead wither but do. not. die. of love no sense of comfort is provided by my morality ... ... (but an unsatiated and infuriated love is, and it wakes me nightly to demand an audience for its’ torture) the reward for my virtue is not exultation, fuck it i. find. no. solace. but where solace sh...

people who blame others for their emotional baggage annoy me. if i had a dollar for every person i've heard blame their vile behaviour some long-since-dead love, i'd be much more of a bitch than i am now. haha. but i digress ... i don't deny that it is possible, even desirable, to ponder "what went wrong" and adjust your behaviour or expectations accordingly. but is that possible when you're too close to have any objectivity ?. using bad past experiences as an excuse to love a new person co...

the world is full of divorced parents who ruin their “first” family and then threaten the world record on disastrous attempts at making another one. and whilst i have never been overly fond of the familial gathering, i like them even less now i don’t KNOW who i’m related to. i have step-siblings. adopted siblings. half-siblings. i have some twice my age and some who are still at school. the only thing we have in common is that we have a shitty father. as i grew up and each of their m...

sensitive new age guys have their place, bless ‘em. i’m sure there are LOTS of women who adore their male partners’ capacity to “understand” their “feelings” and suffer “sympathetic” labour-pains ... ... i just don’t happen to be one of them. it’s all good to be "into" what makes your woman tick, but frankly, men who know more about my menstrual cycle than i do scare me. i like to think of it this way: need-to-know basis. i laugh out loud when my hubby misinterprets my moods. he’s ...

the war is over and we won. hooray. there are rules now. men have to treat women as equals. uh-huh. i get that. but has the fact that men and women are NOT equals, and are not supposed to be equals, escaped everyone else ?. this planet is populated primarily with dual-gendered species, and gender-typical standard behaviour is observable in all animals excepting the human one ... ... who knows better. so i am supposed to be a new woman. i have won the right to leave the home in the mo...

sex is much, much too straightforward for we humans reproductive organs are unique as far as organs go, in that they contribute nothing to our survival. they are purpose built for reproduction and do not depend on pleasurable sensations, although they do afford some. there is no actual thing as "sexuality", and there are no "sex organs": no part of the body is designed solely for pleasurable purposes. you could cite the clitoris, and say its' purpose is only pleasure. and whilst ...

i don't like "scowlers". maybe i have a bit too much to say for myself, but at least i have the nerve to actually SAY it. don't you hate it when you say or do something and somebody makes THAT face ?. that face that says "i completely disapprove of what you just said/did, but i lack the conviction/courage to give voice to that. i will instead sit here with this disapproving look welded onto my countenence and make certain that you notice it". so you try. you really do. you say: "what does ...

it has always fascinated me that humans need interaction with other humans, and that generally this interaction needs to be largely positive in order to be able to live a peaceful life. yet it has long been said that humans require other humans to satisfy an emotional need. individuals deprived of any human contact invariably suffer degrees of emotional distress, and it is well documented that children of emotionally distant parents suffer later in life, often failing to adequately exp...

every time i went to the fields i returned disappointed without understanding the cause of my disappointment. every time i looked at the gray sky i felt my heart contract. every time i heard the singing of the birds and babbling of the spring i suffered without understanding the reason for my suffering. it is said that unsophistication makes a man empty and that emptiness makes him carefree. it may be true among those who were born dead and who exist like frozen corpses; ...

i once dated someone whose father could not be understood by any unrelated person. on my initial encounter with ‘dad’, i was at his front door, and he looked right at me and shouted “nissan final termite chew”. upon my non-response, he repeated himself. louder this time “NISSAN TERMITE FINAL CHEW”. he then stood there, obviously expecting a response. he seemed cheerful enough, so i guessed and said “thanks”. my boyfriend then nudged me and whispered “say it’s nice to finally meet y...

in ontario, canada, a lesbian couple who vowed “til death us do part” on 18 june, 2003, have filed that country’s first ever same-sex divorce action. the women, aged 41 and 61, sealed their ten-year relationship by marrying just one week after same-sex marriage became allowed under canadian law. far from being as they envisioned, the couple formally separated five days after their “legal” wedding ceremony. whilst the ruling liberal canadian government has vowed to legalize same-se...

there's a line in the book "the body" (by stephen king) that stayed with me long after i read it. looking back on his childhood, the author states "i never had any friends later on like the ones i had when i was twelve. christ, does anyone?" . friendships at twelve do have an innocence that withers with the onset of adulthood and its' accompanying self-awareness. things start to get in the way. reality bites, so to speak. people grow up, get jobs, get married, get lives . eventually...

at age 27 i emerged, stunned and unprepared, from the end of a tumultuous 6 year relationship. i had no plans. i had simply decided that living alone (for life if necessary) was preferable to enduring even one more day of something so unhealthy . becoming single again was just a by-product of my decision to begin living my life the way i needed to. the way i have ever since. now, as neat and tidy as that all sounds, i did not get from suddenly-single to happily hitched in one seamless ...