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mignuna's Articles In Misc » Page 2
February 27, 2005 by mignuna
  I have a clown phobia. They terrify me. I place the blame squarely on every awful 80’s ‘horror’ film I ever watched.  I spent my formative years viewing movies about clowns that would sit, smiling and apparently harmless, on a chair in a corner of your bedroom ... until the lights went out. At which point they would suddenly grow very long arms and strangle you in your sleep. Or produce an enormous meat-cleaver from the folds of their voluminous costume and split your ...
January 1, 2005 by mignuna
 

I have briefly disengaged myself from the throng of houseguests to make the following announcement:

Somebody ate all of my Cornflakes.

I can handle the endless snoring from bloated corpse-like guests passed out all over my house.

I can handle the giant electricity, phone and grocery bills we inevitably get lumbered with.

I can handle the utter disregard for my privacy and desire for peace.

I can even handle cooking for seven ravenous people in two sittings every nig...
November 29, 2004 by mignuna
 I used to work with a fellow who had a younger sister with cerebral palsy. He often spoke with pride of her high intelligence and academic achievements, and also of her occasionally mischievous nature. I remember one occasion when he told me, with some excitement, that she had been chosen to be interviewed by a journalist from a major magazine on behalf of the students at her university. The day of the interview came, and he waited for her phone call to be collected from the maga...
November 13, 2004 by mignuna
I cannot keep still in my sleep.  I for some reason assume a sleeping position my husband has named ‘the starfish’ (arms out, legs out), thus occupying the entire bed. From there, I for some reason like to hurl the blankets across the room with great force and smash the bedside lamp, occasionally followed by bestowing my sleeping husband with a thump on the head. (Neither of us has any idea why I do this. Happily, my husband chooses not to view this as some type of repressed w...
October 28, 2004 by mignuna
 When I lived in Sydney and went to work every day, I was what one might call ‘well-groomed’. (Okay, technically, I was what one might call ‘groomed to within an inch of my life’). At the time, I never gave my intensive self-cleaning-and-preening a second thought. It was as much a part of my routine as eating or sleeping. I had a job. I worked in an office building. Every other person that worked there did exactly the same thing. Looked exactly the same way. That the duties we collecti...
September 5, 2004 by mignuna
I read a while ago about the concept restaurants “Dinner In The Dark”, and although there are none located anywhere near us, I was intrigued by the concept.

Basically, there are no lights at all in the restaurant, and the staff are visually impaired. Upon arrival, you are guided to your table and seated by the maitre’d, the wait staff read you the days’ menu choices, and you make your selection.

(Of course, Braille menus are available on request).

Imagine it: yourself and your compani...
September 1, 2004 by mignuna
I was watching the (Australian) television show 'The Panel' last night, and the subject of 'mooning' came up.

Specifically, they were discussing the fact that an Australian Olympic swimming medalist had begun to pull his track bottoms down during an athletes' celebration with the intention of 'mooning' the other athletes, and had been 'removed' for questioning about the incident.

Apparently, Olympic officials has not been sure what the swimmer was 'planning to do'. As 'mooning' is known...
August 27, 2004 by mignuna
Art imitating life ?. Uh, make that death. Although I can't say I have much interest at all in art auctions, I found a recent example of art imitating life that I loved in spite of myself.

British auctioneers 'House and Son' recently auctioned a figurine of Anne Boleyn, 2nd wife of Henry VIII, who was beheaded in the Tower of London in 1536.

After the successful bid was made, a member of the auction house staff, whilst attempting to remove the figurine from display, accidentally knocke...
August 25, 2004 by mignuna
Snail sex. No, this is not about some weird sexual slow-breathing palaver for humans. It’s about sex, snail style. Snails, as in molluscs. Slimy, icky little molluscs ... ew ... but I digress.

The common garden snail, Helia aspersa (native to Europe and also found in California and South America), is a hermaphrodite, meaning that it can assume either a male or female role in reproduction as required. (Yes, of course this story gets better).

Garden snails court from between 15 minutes to ...
August 24, 2004 by mignuna
One-in-a-million miracles happen, on average, 295 times per day in America alone, says Michael Shermer in this months’ Scientific American “Skeptic” column.

“I cannot always explain such specific incidents” Shermer writes, “but a principle of probability called 'the Law of Large Numbers' shows that an event with a low probability of occurrence in a small number of trials has a high probability of occurrence in a large number of trials”.

Shermer explains how, in their book ‘Debunked !', ...
December 8, 2005 by mignuna
(This was sent to me by a friend and I can't find the original source, but I thought it was worth passing on. Mig)

 

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm, life isn't always...
March 15, 2005 by mignuna
I have a secret confession to make: I love nerdy men.

I love men who study stuff and take serious looking notes in cafes whilst frowning into huge textbooks.

I can’t help it !.

I love men who blurt out (sound but embarrassingly boring) theories at dinner parties !.

I also love men who know a lot of trivial but interesting facts, and who like watching nature and animal documentaries.

I love men who wear cardigans, who are too busy thinking to do anything about their gut, and who...
March 14, 2005 by mignuna
 I recently overheard my husband honking and sniggering and asked him what he was laughing at. Incapable of speech, he merely gestured to the television screen - upon which was a woman dressed in a cow suit singing and dancing about the stage, clutching at her rubber ‘udder’ as she did so.

At first suspecting some awful ‘arty’ remake of ‘The Rocky Horror Picture Show’, I was astonished to find that I was in fact viewing an actual contestant on one of the ‘Idol’ shows. Now, you may or may...
December 1, 2004 by mignuna
 Of the many things that astonish me about modern ‘love’, the one that gets me the most is the ability of a diamond engagement ring to turn a nice, everyday woman into the-bitch-bride-from-hell. I’ve been a bridesmaid on numerous occasions, and, without exception, as I clutched a damp tissue and waved goodbye to the bride and her brand new groom as they departed for their exotic honeymoon, I have thought exactly the same thing: “I’m so glad you’re leaving the country for a few weeks, Y...
October 23, 2004 by mignuna
  Just when you thought it was safe to go back to your blog ... Here is my question to you, dear reader, regarding my dear friend the blog spammer ... if it has to annoy me with its’ endless blah links and ads, then don’t you think the dopey bollocks could at least have the decency to make some fugging sense ?. I can't believe it has 'Penis Erection' as one of it's links. Why must it torture me ?. Why ?. ‘Penis Erection’ ???.  (I mean, come on. ‘Penis Erection’ ?. L...